PATS CHAT

Did you take that pic off her Tinder

no i took it off the udders i had

Unblocking pipes in the bathroom
Months of no haircuts and endless handwashing really jam's them up

Counting down the hours to midnight so I can book an food home delivery slot for next month

Yuk!
Just think of all the hands that have been over, on and under the packaging your 'food' delivery has undergone. Must be reeking with Coronavirus'.
I hope you wash each piece separately in hot soapy, dettol'd water before you let it in to the house.

It's better than doing it in person. Everytime I go.... a nutter talks to me

but how do you know the delivery man isnt a nutter
some guy at the end of his tether,pissed off with his shite job
thinks fck it ive had enough,im packing it in,i will just do this one last drop
and its you with your simpering fawning face
oh im just in the mood for a face like this
BANG
tw@ts you then fcks off with the money you were proffering via your limp wristed hands

just a thought like

You have a point there

Overall, I understand there job and the shit they take daily. (Once I was a paperboy )

So when they arrive, not being a pain in the ass who demands they check every item and unpack for me helps. There not seeing inside my house

Just let them drop the stuff off at the front door and let them move onto the next job. Even if this means there sat in the van smoking a fag for 10 mins afterwards